OCD

A.S. asked 2 months ago

As Salaamu Alaykum, I am someone who suffers with a waswasa issue, for the most part of close to 5 years maybe.
On my iPhone I have The Qur’aan app, I have Hadith resources, I have access to online database of Islamic books, I have many bookmarks of Islamic resources and books, I have notes from classes and many quotes from classes and Shuyukh. On my iPad I have The Qur’aan app, I have Hadith resources, I have access to online database of Islamic books, and I have notes from classes and many quotes from classes and Shuyukh. On my laptop I have many I have notes from classes and many quotes from classes and Shuyukh.
My ipad and laptop contain many many notes from years of classes (Islamic Studies).
With that in mind, I have a fear that if I watched something Haraam to masturbate or go to listen to Haraam, I fear that if I went to do that, I would fall into Kufr because of disrespect of what is on my devices. So I didn’t use to do that, then at one point, I was tempted and searched to look at Haraam on my laptop and did an evil sin of masturbation also. After this I repented and may have also intended to repent from kufr as I feared I did kufr.
At another event after this I was on my phone and saw something which tempted me and I searched for Haraam and did the evil act of masturbation and I carried on searching and did the act again and another time. I may have been telling myself that I am not pleased with kufr whilst searching etc but after I did all that, I repented and intended to repent from kufr and being pleased with kufr if I had fallen into that.
A time after that, the feeling inside felt high and I walked to get my laptop and I wonder if I though because my laptop doesn’t have the Qur’aan app downloaded I will use that, my laptop does have many notes from years of classes and many quotes from Shuyukh and answers. I looked and listened to Haraam on it and carried on after I did an evil sin of masturbation and ended up masturbation two more time looking at Haraam.
Before getting my laptop I was telling myself I am not doing kufr thinking to an answer a Shaykh said where he didn’t call a person kaafir for having impermissible things on his phone whilst having The Qur’aan app on there and another answer where the questioner would watch porn I think on his device that he read Qur’aan from. I wonder if I went to my laptop thinking that I don’t read The Qur’aan on it and went to look at wrong.
So I may have told myself I am not doing kufr but prior to this when I was on my bed, I told myself that if I do this act, I don’t know if it is kufr (even though I had previously seen those answers from the Shaykhs) and if I went and did it and then intended to say the Shahaadah after then that is being pleased with kufr because you don’t know if it is kufr but just in case you are going to read the Shahaadah so you are pleased with kufr
When the temptation rose, I walked over to my laptop telling myself I am not pleased with kufr and I searched for Haraam and carried on and listened to Haraam and did the wrong act with my hand 3 times. After I was done, I may have first told myself I didn’t do kufr but then I feared that what if I did and so I said the Shahaadah many times fearing I did kufr, fearing I did disrespect, fearing I did Istihlaal and I don’t know if there were other fears I had
A. With this in mind, did I ever fall into kufr in these events or any similar events where I may have firstly thought I am not doing kufr but then after out of fear in case I did I would say the Shahaadah and if this was repeated more than once, did I become kaafir?
B. For someone who has The Qur’aan app on his phone, Hadith books and resources, access to online database of Islamic books, many bookmarks of Islamic resources and books, notes from years of classes and many quotes from classes and Shuyukh, if on that device or devices he went and searched for Haraam to watch and listen to, intending to masturbate, has such a person committed kufr?
Bi. In the same scenario mentioned above, if he wasn’t sure if it was kufr but did the act and then said the Shahaadah afterwards is that being pleased with kufr and so he did kufr?
Bii. In the same scenario above except that he told himself he is not doing kufr but then after he did the wrong acts he intended to say the Shahaadah intending to repent from kufr, did he do kufr?
Biii. In the same scenario as above, if he told himself he is not doing kufr but then after doing the Haraam acts (watching, listening, masturbating) he repented intending to repent from kufr and if he repeated these acts at other times, at those other times, did he do kufr and become kaafir?

1 Answers
Mufti Wahaaj Staff answered 2 months ago

بسم الله الرحمٰن الرحيم

الجواب حامداً ومصلياً

As-salāmu ʿalaykum wa-raḥmatullāhi wa-barakātuh.

None of the scenarios presented constitute kufr. At the same time, two things must be addressed:

  1. Wasāwis (Satanic whispers)
  2. Guarding the gaze/pornography addiction

Wasāwis

As you have stated, you are experiencing wasāwis. Do not worry, and do not give them power over you. They cannot harm you. Allāh ﷻ informs us:

إِنَّمَا النَّجْوَىٰ مِنَ الشَّيْطَانِ لِيَحْزُنَ الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا وَلَيْسَ بِضَارِّهِمْ شَيْئًا إِلَّا بِإِذْنِ اللَّهِ ۚ وَعَلَى اللَّهِ فَلْيَتَوَكَّلِ الْمُؤْمِنُونَ

“Whispering is an act of Satan, one that aims at causing grief to the believers; yet without Allāh’s leave no harm can be caused to them. So, in Allāh should the believers put all their trust.” (58:10)

After every ṣalāh, recite Sūrah Falaq and Sūrah Nās once along with the following āyah 11 times:

رَّبِّ أَعُوذُ بِكَ مِنْ هَمَزَاتِ الشَّيَاطِينِ

“My Rabb! I seek your protection from the whispers of the Shayāṭīn.” (23:97)

You should also recite this āyah at the times you are experiencing wasāwis.

We also recommend that you read this book by Ḥaḍrat Mawlānā Yūnus Patel (raḥimahullāh) for help with combatting wasāwis: https://yunuspatel.co.za/downloads/Whisperings-of-Shaytaan_2.pdf.

Guarding the Gaze/Pornography Addiction

There are two major causes of the sin you have described:

  1. Not controlling the gaze
  2. Addiction

 

Controlling the Gaze

Rasūlullāh ﷺ advised[1] that youth who have the ability to get married should do so. This is the most effective way to protect one’s gaze and chastity.

  • Make efforts to prepare yourself for marriage. Study hard and have realistic goals and plans for your future. This commitment will show potential spouses and their parents that you are ready for the responsibilities of marriage.
  • If you are not currently able to marry, Rasūlullāh ﷺ strongly encouraged fasting abundantly as a means of shielding one from their desires. However, along with fasting, one must make and effort to reduce eating overall – both in suḥūr/ifṭār and on non-fasting days.[2]
  • Important Note: One should think long and hard before get married if they have not gotten the problem of watching pornography under control. At the very least, practical steps must be taken to address this issue. Inshāʾ Allāh, this point will be addressed in the second section – addiction.

Another effective step in controlling the gaze is to ponder upon the great reward in store for the one who is able to do this, especially in times as challenging as this. Rasūlullāh ﷺ informed us that the reward for the Muslim who sees a beautiful woman but then lowers their gaze is to taste the sweetness of īmān![3] Ponder upon this:

  • If you make a mistake and are not able to control yourself, seek Allāh’s forgiveness. Verily Allāh loves those who seek forgiveness.[4]
  • If you are able to control your gaze, you will taste the sweetness of īmān.

In both situations, you will succeed – as long as you do not lose hope. View this challenge as an opportunity to taste the sweetness of īmān and become the beloved of Allāh.

One of the great luminaries of our generation[5] commented that in the past, one would go to the market to buy goods. Now, one goes to the markets an acquires the sweetness of īmān!

Addiction

When a person begins to watch pornography, their brain undergoes chemical changes and eventually becomes dependent on watching it to satisfy its urges. This is the same as any other addiction. Addictions are difficult to overcome. Not everyone can stop them cold turkey. It is necessary to keep in mind that:

  • Seeking help is nothing to be ashamed of.
  • A person may slip up (“fall off the wagon”) after having been in control for a long time.

To help combat this addiction, certain measures can be taken:

  • Patience and perseverance: It is not easy to break any addiction, and there will be times when extreme discomfort is felt.
  • Keeping internet enabled devices outside of the room, particularly at night time or other vulnerable times.
    • If you live with someone you trust – parents, older siblings, roommates – give them your device at night.
  • Open up to someone and have them be an accountability partner. There are some softwares that send reports to people you have assigned when you go inappropriate websites.
  • There are some courses, both in person and online, some secular and some religious-based, that can help overcome this addiction. They should be availed, and no one should feel ashamed in using these methods.

Along with the above approaches, fervent duʿā and a refusal to give up are essential.

Summary

  1. Control your gaze.
  2. Follow some of the methods listed under “Addiction.”
  3. Abundant duʿā
  4. Perseverance and refusal to stop trying to leave the sin, even if you slip repeatedly.

May Allāh ﷻ allow you to overcome this challenge and all other challenges in your life. May He give you success in this world and the next, and may He bestow His special love and favors upon you.

والله تعالى أعلم وعلمه أتم وبه التوفيق
And Allāh Taʿālā Knows Best

Muftī Mohammed Wahaajuddin bin Salauddin
(May Allāh forgive him and his parents)

 

[1] مرقاة المفاتيح، كتاب النكاح، ج٧، دار الكتب العلمية، الطبعة الرابعة

عن عبد الله بن مسعود رضي الله عنه قال: قال رسول الله ﷺ يا معشر الشباب من استطاع منكم الباءة فليتزوج، فإنه أغض للبصر وأحصن للفرج، ومن لم يستطع فعليه بالصوم، فإنه له وجاء . متفق عليه.قال الملا علي القاري: (فإنه) أي: الصوم (له) أي: لمن قدر على الجماع ولم يقدر على التزوج لفقره (وجاء) بالكسر بالمد أي: كسر لشهوته، وهو في الأصل رض الخصيتين ودقهما لتضعف الفحولة، فالمعنى أن الصوم يقطع الشهوة ويدفع شر المني كالوجاء. قال الطيبي – رحمه الله تعالى -: وكان الظاهر أن يقول: فعليه بالجوع، وقلة ما يزيد في الشهوة وطغيان الماء من الطعام، فعدل إلى الصوم إذ ما جاء بمعنى عبادة هي برأسها مطلوبة، وليؤذن بأن المطلوب من نفس الصوم الجوع وكسر الشهوة، وكم من صائم يمتلئ معى اه. ويحتمل أن يكون الصوم فيه هذا السر والنفع لهذا المرض، ولو أكل وشرب كثيرا إذا كانت له نية صحيحة، ولأن الجوع في بعض الأوقات والشبع في بعضها ليس كالشبع المستمر في تقوية الجماع، والله تعالى أعلم. (ص٢٢٨)

[2] حوالة سابقة

[3] مرقاة المفاتيح، كتاب النكاح، ج٧، دار الكتب العلمية، الطبعة الرابعة

وعن أبي أمامة عن النبي ﷺ قال: ما من مسلم ينظر إلى محاسن امرأة أول مرة ثم يغض بصره إلا أحدث الله له عبادة يجد حلاوتها. رواه أحمد. قال الملا علي القاري: ولا نمو في الإنسان أكمل وأفضل أن يفتح الله عليه باب ما خلق لأجله من العبادة، وكمالها أن يجد العابد حلاوتها ويزول عنه تعب الطاعة وتكاليفها الشاقة عميمة وهذا المقام هو الذي أشار إليه صلوات الله عليه وسلامه بقوله: وقرة عيني في الصلاة، وأرحنا يا بلال (ص٢٦٤)

وعن بريدة قال: قال رسول الله ﷺ لعلي: يا علي لا تتبع النظرة النظرة فإن لك الأولى وليست لك الآخرة . رواه أحمد، والترمذي، وأبو داود، والدارم. قال الملا علي القاري: (وليست لك الآخرة) أي النظرة الآخرة لأنها باختيارك فتكون عليك، قال الطيبي رحمه الله: دل على أن الأولى نافعة كما أن الثانية ضارة لأن الناظر إذا أمسك عنان نظره ولم يتبع الثانية أجر (ص٢٥٧)

[4] إِنَّ اللَّهَ يُحِبُّ التَّوَّابِينَ وَيُحِبُّ الْمُتَطَهِّرِينَ ‎ (سورة البقرة: ٢٢٢)

[5] حضرت مولانا حكيم أختر صاحب نور الله مرقده